Three episodes, a shrinking harem, one Jesus-shaped plot twist and a whole lot of Miranda. Here’s everything that went down this week on Farmer Wants A Wife 2026
Week two and Farmer Wants A Wife 2026 is rapidly becoming less about finding love and more about whatever the hell is happening between Apple A Day Farmer Zac and Miranda.
The week kicked off with the arrival of the remaining sister-wives, who rolled into the farms like a giggling group of schoolgirls on camp.
Except at Hairy Dairy Farmer Jason’s place.
His harem was already one sister-wife down before the Everest had barely stopped rolling. Seems she hit Kingaroy, realised this whole moving-to-a-farm thing might actually happen and promptly bailed.
Meanwhile, the lucky 24-hour date girls were already settled in and it didn’t take long for the interrogation to begin. “Sooooo did you kiss?”
Ladies. Have you never watched this show before?
The group date challenge followed, with the women anonymously pitching ideas to impress their farmer. Apple A Day Zac ended up in hospital after a dramatic slip-and-slide incident left everyone convinced he’d broken his thumb. #hedidnt
Farmer J-Rad unintentionally gave Carly another solo date and the rest of the ladies were dirty. While they soaked in a spa with a bottle of champas bitching about the injustice of it all, over at Holy Moly Alex’ ‘s farm, Gabby whisked him away on a culinary adventure and Hairy Dairy Farmer Jason made cocktails with Jessica.
Yes, another Jessica. There are more Jessicas on this show than candles.
Jessica was horrified there were no Ubers in the country but seemed prepared to overlook that fact because she “really loves waking up to the sound of chickens”. #buckbuckwhat?
Meanwhile Cowboy Dylan’s date Lily headed to the kids craft section of Kmart, bought a couple of bird boxes and sat under a tree discussing their feathered friends while gluing and painting.
Dylan was absolutely stoked. “We can talk about trees. I’m super happy. Bloody oath.”
And in true FWAW fashion, they all pashed. Cause why not hey?
The Great Culling
Then it was time to kick a sister-wife to the curb.
Cowboy Dylan farewelled background player Tahneil.
J-Rad sent Georgia home. No one knows who Georgia is.
Scary Eyebrows Delia did J-Rad a favour and eliminated herself.
Apple A Day Zac completely chickened out and kept everyone.
Over at Holy Moly Alex’s farm, a shocking discovery was uncovered. He found out that Lock It In Eddy has another man in her life.
Jesus.
Alex seems like the sort of bloke who likes to be the most important man in the room. Unfortunately for him, he’s competing with the Son of God.
He’s now plotting how to get his necklace back.
At Hairy Dairy HQ, Jason gathered everyone around approximately 500 candles and announced nobody would be going home.
Jessica the chicken loving cocktail maker called bullshit.
After a brief tanty she packed her bags, grabbed her vape and disappeared into the night.
At this point Hairy Dairy’s harem is dropping like flies.
Farmer Wants a Wife 2026 Country Ball
Of course it wouldn’t be Farmer Wants A Wife without a Country Ball.
There was bitching and drama, bits out, tits out and Cowboy Dylan looked like Allington’s had thrown up on him. Meanwhile Miranda was in desperate need of a blending brush and a make-up colour consultation.. #trumpvibes
After everyone had a booze-induced cry about life, Jessica decided to ditch the drama and left Apple A Day Zac and the Country Ball. Maya jumped in and pulled Zac aside for a chat and looked like she might finally get a bit of one-on-one time.
Miranda was horrified that Maya would be bold enough to take an opportunity she’d failed to grab herself.
“Damn you Maya. How dare you try and spend time with the bloke we’re all here to date.”
A few suspicious tears later and Miranda had her hooks in.
Take that Maya!
Miranda had successfully snogged Apple A Day Zac even if she did have to ask for it.
Meanwhile Hairy Dairy Farmer Jason lost ANOTHER sister-wife when vet Beth ugly cried her way out of the competition because her daughter wanted her home. Way to go ruining mum’s love life kid.
Solo Dates
By the time the farmers had to choose their next solo date, Hairy Dairy Farmer Jason was down to just two women. Two!
Farmer Wants A Wife has morphed into Survivor for Jason, so he flipped a coin and chose “I don’t want kids Poppy”.
Neither of them looked particularly excited about it.
There was horse riding, another cheese platter, more champagne and eventually an awkward pash.
Meanwhile poor Logan sat back at the farm wondering if she was the default option. #yesyouare
Holy Moly Alex chose Suzannah. Educated, cultured and not overly interested in discussing Jesus. #winwin
Cowboy Dylan picked Scarlett and took her to a rodeo because clearly no future Mrs Dylan is going to think rodeos are cruel and unnecessary.
Scarlett explained she was “like, kinda like, umm, yeah, like, this is gonna sound weird but like, I’m kinda like a slow burn.”
Five minutes later they had locked lips. #slowburnmyarse
J-Rad took Yvonne to make pizza before they jumped into a plunge pool together. By the end of the date J-Rad looked like he’d just won the meat tray.
Then there was Apple A Day Farmer Zac and Miranda.
At this point the show should probably just be renamed Farmer Wants Miranda.
Zac thinks he’s punching above his weight. The rest of Australia would like to punch her.
He took her and her Chanel handbag to a flower farm because he wanted to know if they were suited and whether she’d fit this lifestyle.
“I caaarn’t see whyyyy naawwt Zaaac.”
Oooh lordy. I can.
Then she unveiled the horrifying couple name ‘Zacaranda’. #waitwhileivomit
She again put the moves on for a pash and poor little Zac looked like a kid in a candy store.
But too much candy can make you sick.
Beyond The Farm
With the pashing temporarily out of the way, the farmers took their sister-wives beyond the farm gate.
Jarrad has discovered the ultimate secret weapon in the search for love: the Murray River. Forget candlelit dinners and helicopter rides. Nothing says romance quite like being flung around Morgan on a biscuit behind a boat. The ladies oohed and aahed over his muscular arms while J-Rad soaked up every second of it. #notabadrigjrad
Apple A Day Zac and Cowboy Dylan headed to the Adelaide Hills for a game of footy with teammates and family.
Zac’s sister-wives pulled on the boots and got stuck in. Judging by the shorts, I suspect the wardrobe department raided a Year 8 PE shed five minutes before filming.
Dylan’s crew, meanwhile, looked less like a footy side and more like a group project nobody wanted to be part of. Only quiet little Renae took up the challenge and Dylan was filthy.
Not quite as filthy as he became later at the pub after a few rum cans when he delivered a full spray about nobody backing him up.
Meanwhile, over in Miranda Land, everything had completely gone to shit.
Maya spoke to Zac’s twin sister Izzy about the growing tension in the house. To absolutely nobody’s surprise, Izzy appeared to identify Miranda as a red flag and let Apple A Day Farmer Zac know it.
Like all good reality TV villains, Miranda attempted to flip the narrative and make herself the victim.
There were tears and walk offs, confrontation and TV reality gold.
Strap yourselves in people, this train wreck is only just getting started.
Farmer Wants A Wife 2026 airs on Channel 7 and 7plus, Sunday-Tuesday at 7pm and 7.30pm.
Subscribe to our newsletter for more regional stories, events and unsolicited opinions on people finding love on television.
